Love and other Chores.

I have never been in a relationship before, it was not because I am not attractive enough or lacking in sexual prowess or a homeless hobo, nah, it was neither of those reasons, I have never been in a relationship before because no one of the opposite sex will date me but will rather have me like a “brother” to them.

Prior to the first time I ever told a girl how I felt about her and by consequence got ‘friendzoned’, ‘brother-zoned’, and ‘best-friend zoned’ (in that order), I was a shy wreck *laughs hysterically*. I used to be so shy that it was hard for me to speak to strangers unless spoken to, so generally, I just wanted to be left alone to live in my head in peace while I ignored the world. As you would guess I had to go to school and when I got into the university I was exposed to so many experiences on people-relations and interpersonal relations with strangers that I learnt how to handle and control my shy nature and feel comfortable talking to strangers.

When I got into the university, I fell in love for the first time, and I knew it was love because I can still recall how I felt when the first girl I fell in love with told me the famous “You are like a brother to me” line for the first time, I swear to God, I lost my appetite to do most things for months, and being teenager then it was hard to handle, but I had good friends who were there to help me move on from the “rejection of love” phase I was in kind of felt like Ser Jorah Mormont… oh yes, they also would never stop teasing me about getting “zoned” and we’d all laugh about it, I know right, BOYS!.

The second time I got zoned, was a year or two after I got my first dosage of the “You are like a (insert the zone) to me” line, and I had already vowed I was not going to go out of my way to fall in love again or better still I had another backup vow that I shall not be “zoned” again. I never

intended to fall in love with this young lady, I just wanted to be her friend, but we became really close friends and suddenly I started developing deeper feelings for her, I thought she had same feelings for me since she kept addressing me as “dear”, so I decided to tell her how I felt about her so we can move this friendship to the next level… if only I could go back in time to warn my younger self, I’d probably just go get a burger instead, because the effect of getting zoned again made me grow in a lot of ways I never really anticipated. Anyway, the young lady I was courting told me “I cannot date you because you are like a brother to me”I was so sad after she broke my heart in such a friendly fashion.

A year after, I met another young lady who became a close friend. so I got to know her and I loved her personality a lot, we became best friends and we literally talk every day since I met her 3 years ago. It’s so weird that we literally have an endless pit of topics to talk about ranging from the weirdest arguments to stupid gossips about people we don’t even care about, but this did not stop her from telling me “My family members love me too” to my “I love you” heartbroken declaration… when she responded to my love declaration with that statement, I could not help myself I just started laughing, I could not even heartbroken anymore…

And it was at this moment I knew that I will probably never find love if I keep looking for it or stumbling into it, no point in getting zoned or curved for eternity.*laughs*

A friend once said that “if you get curved by anyone, just take it as a character upgrade and keep it moving”. In retrospect, I must confess that from the first time I got zoned up to the last time I got curved, I have matured and I have learnt that what self-love and appreciation is, I have also learnt a lot about how to tell a girl how I feel without having being afraid of rejection or being sad for more than an hour. Compared to the first time I got friendzoned, I am not even as shy as I used to be, if you ask my friends about me they’d probably say something within the lines of “that one? He is a nuisance”.  All in all, I may have been single all my life, I still do not regret it and I am not even in a hurry to find love anymore, I am happy where I am and if love finds me along the way, I would be sure to welcome it with open arms.


One thought on “Love and other Chores.

  1. Great post. You are an amazing person and there’s someone out there. You have the guts, which some people lack, to express your feelings which is a great quality to have.


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